A Treasury of Child-Rearing Advice

公益財団法人仙台観光国際協会 Sendai Tourism, Convention and International Association.

Material Compilation: Sendai City Ayashi Nursery, Ochiai Nursery, Kumagane Nursery
Material Provision: Nursery Section, Children’s Future Bureau, City of Sendai
Editing and Translation: Sendai International Relations Association

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HOMEAge 2 > Tantrums (2-3 years)

Age 2

Tantrums (2-3 years)

They say “No!” to everything adults suggest, “I do it” if you try to help them, and then throws a fit when they can’t do it . . . are you at a loss for how to respond to your child at this stage?

Children at this age are overflowing with the wish to “grow up” and be recognized as a “big kid.” That is why they assert themselves with all their might to the adults close to them.

When an adult who is important to her tells her to do something . . .


They want to grow up so can’t accept being treated like a child.

But the truth is they can’t do things on their own yet, either.


When they realizes they can’t do it, they get frustrated.

If you confront your child they won’t accept what you say. They are watching how you respond. At times like that, try changing your approach and using these words that work like magic on a child’s heart!

Give your child the chance to show how grown up they are by saying,
“OK, before we eat, will you show me how good you are at _______?”

“I don’t wear this!”

Let your child make a choice by saying,
“What do you want to wear? Why don’t you bring me what you want to wear.”


“Time to put it away.”
→“No! Not done!”

Give your child time to finish what they are doing so they don’t feel forced by saying,
“When you’re done put it away, OK? I’ll wait!”

When you try to do something for your child

Child: "No! I do it!"...... "I can't do it!"
Adult: "That's why I said I would do it for you!"
Is not what to do

Wait for the right time and then say,
“Is it okay if I help you? I’ll just hold it here for you.”
This way your child can make the decision and feel the satisfaction of doing it their self.

It’s not as if your child can do everything that they want to.
For example, there may be times when they want to wear clothes that are still in the wash, doesn’t want to take medicine, or doesn’t want to go home from the park.

At times like that . . .

“What would you rather do, _______ or _______?”

“Which cup do you want to use?
This one? This one?”

“Do you want to go home in an eee-ooo ambulance?
Or an oooOOOooo firetruck?
Or a fwooosh bullet train?”

Try to give your child a choice even within something she doesn’t have a choice about.

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